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“Happiness is a conscious choice, not an automatic response.” – Mildred Barthel

They say that when life gives you lemons, make lemonade, and when life throws stumbling blocks at you, make stepping stones out of them. The point is that you must stay positive, work with available resources, and move towards your goals. However, many people get dejected at the slightest of setbacks and withdraw into their shell. This takes the focus away from their goals. They must learn to re­main robust and happy and resolve every issue and face every obstacle with grit and perseverance.

Being happy can help them face odds with ease. Here are the thinking and be­havioral traits of happy people who have overcome very difficult situations. These should help people stay positive, happy and in legitimate pursuit of their goals:

  1. Happy people do not evaluate whether life is fair or unfair. They just take life as it comes, face all its moments, and just make the best of whatever is thrown at them, good or bad.
  2. Happy people do not have unchecked egos. Egoism is the biggest deal-break­er: it breaks business deals, it alienates friends and family, it makes people ob­stinate, it skews life, and it causes regret at a later date. Happy people are proud people, they are not egoistic.
  3. Happy people do not believe in the concept of living for others. Let's look at some examples; a model or an actor al­ways wants to look good everywhere be­cause she wants the public to think the world of her; a CEO may adopt a lifestyle that makes everyone in awe of him. Hap­py people couldn't care what the world thinks of them, they don't bother about what their neighbor says about them. They live life on their own terms, happily absorbing life's lessons and developing and enjoying life over time. This is not to say that happy folks do not enjoy being complimented or giving compliments; they do, but they don't get carried away by these.
  4. Though happy people listen to and respect other people's opinions, they do what they consider is correct. They do not jump to conclusions nor do they make split-second decisions - they cal­culate outcomes and then make care­fully considered decisions.
  5. Happy people welcome constructive criticism. They genuinely want to improve in life and they embrace every constructive critique and use the feedback to improve themselves.
  6. Happy and contented folks are toler­ant of others. Even if they dislike a per­son, they will always respect his views and let him have his space. They are tolerant folks with an open mind.
  7. They also will not get into an un­necessary argument with anyone. They would rather put their point of view across without getting the least excited. If their point of view is not accepted, they democratically withdraw. Getting into fights, criticizing someone, gossip­ing, or going into a mighty sulk is the last thing expected from them.
  8. These individuals do not make judg­ment calls. Even if their associate or friend commits an unpardonable blooper, they will not use it to judge that person. They are optimistic and always feel that things will get better and people will improve based on their learning experiences.
  9. Happy folks are not control freaks. They’d rather let events take their own course rather than trying to control the outcome. However, that does not mean that they do not control what they are required to.
  10. They are peaceful folks who let their minds rule rather than their hearts. They are fearless because they are truthful and have nothing to hide. They don't get angry because they accept things on a practical and philosophical level. These guys are cool.
  11. They are relaxed and fun to be with. However, they are completely focused on their life's goals. They learn from negative experiences and don't allow negative ex­periences to depress them.
  12. Finally, happy folks are simple folks. They enjoy whatever life has been given them and work towards being happier.

You can be a happy person too. You'll know you are a happy person when you look upon life as an adventure and ev­ery day as new. You will begin to respect your life's goals and love and care much more for your family and friends. You will start rubbing off good vibes on others and people will get drawn to you. That's the day you will know you are a happy person. The pursuit of happiness is a wonderful adventure. When you get it, everything else follows.

© Michael Griffiths. All Rights Reserved.

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